Better a dry crust with peace and quiet than a house full of feasting, with strife. (Proverbs 1:17)
I love Chinese food. In fact, I think it loves me too. What other kind of meal gives you such a huge menu selection, variety of tastes and a hollow wisdom giving cookie at the end?
One of my favorite dishes to order is called "Happy Family". If you are not familiar with this item, it gets its name from its multiple mixture of mouthwatering munchies that add up to one mongo meal. I'm pretty sure that every plant and animal family is represented somewhere in the dish.
Too bad life isn't that way, because wouldn't it be great if there was another recipe for a "Happy Family" that would apply to people instead of platters?
No, I'm not talking about cannibalism! What I'm trying to get at is a formula for the group of people who live under the same roof. Deep down, don't we all desire to have joy within our homes? Yet there are many folks in this day and age who view family as the hurricane of their lives: a veritable storm of conflict and inner turmoil. Parents filling up their schedules with work and activities, and children delving into friendships and video games- many times simply to avoid being around each other.
I guess "Happy Family" just isn't a menu option for a lot of families- which isn't the way God intended it to be.
Did you know that He actually gives us the recipe in His Word? It's simple really- and it is mind-boggling to me how many parents and children ignore it, then wonder why they find home such a bitter place.
So let me pass on God's ingredients for "Happy Family", and then you decide if you want to change the list of options in your household.
First, start individually with an uncompromising relationship with Jesus:
And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength. (Mark 12:30)
All the other items build on this one, so if you don't add it- forget it!
Next, parents add enormous amounts of marital stability. This is made up of two key elements- both of which must be present; otherwise this ingredient goes very sour.
You husbands must love your wives and never treat them harshly. (Colossians 3:19)
You wives will submit to your husbands as you do to the Lord. (Ephesians 5:22)
Add to this mixture parent/child bonding. This one is a little tricky, because most people only consider one half of the combination- which (again) has two components.
And now a word to you fathers. Don't make your children angry by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction approved by the Lord. (Ephesians 6:4)
Children, obey your parents because you belong to the Lord, for this is the right thing to do. (Ephesians 6:1)
Finally, throw in the "golden rule" sauce, which adds a particularly sweet flavor to all the ingredients:
Do for others what you would like them to do for you. This is a summary of all that is taught in the law and the prophets. (Matthew 7:12)
There you have it: the Father's formula for a favorable family. You may think that this looks too simple, but you would be amazed how the application of these elements would radically change the atmosphere of most households.
I'll close with your 'fortune cookie' message for the day:
Are your days less than delightful in your domicile (Home)? Try ordering up "Happy Family"!
P.A.
I read about this doctor who died and didn't leave a bunch of money for his wife. She couldn't figure what happened to all his assets, so she checked back through his records with the intensity of a private investigator. What would she find? Did he blow all the cash on gambling? Did he have a mistress who he supported on the side? Was he a drug addict who floated to cocaine market in his area?
No. All she found was a number of accounts that were crossed through with this note:
"Forgiven - too poor to pay."
But this wasn't enough for the physician's wife. Later on she decided that these accounts must be paid in full and she proceeded to sue for money. When the case came to court, the judge asked but one question. Is this your husband's handwriting? When she replied that it was, he responded: "Sorry ma'am, but there is no court in the land that can obtain a debt once the word forgiven has been written."
Ever felt unforgiven? There are few things worse in life than having a gnawing, belittling, condemning voice in your head saying that someone is holding blame over your head even after you apologized.
Maybe that's why there are verses like I John 1:9
"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness."
I love that verse, and I apply it daily. That's why I can know and feel forgiven.
But what does this verse have to do with our relationship with other people? Plenty...let me explain.
First and foremost - every human on earth has offended God and is in need of forgiveness in order to restore our relationship with Him and go to heaven. Just like in the story above, God looked at the "bill" we owed Him, and because of Christ's death He can write: "Forgiven-too poor to pay" when we trust Him for salvation.
But that's not where it ends! Too many believers are just like the doctor's wife. They go digging through past records and demanding payment from people. Sort of reminds me of a story that Jesus told- see if you can pick up the theme:
Then Peter came to him and asked, "Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?"
"No!" Jesus replied, "Seventy times seven! For this reason, the Kingdom of Heaven can be compared to a king who decided to bring his accounts up to date with servants who had borrowed money from him. In the process, one of his debtors was brought in who owed him millions of dollars. He couldn't pay, so the king ordered that he, his wife, his children, and everything he had be sold to pay the debt. But the man fell down before the king and begged him, `Oh, sir, be patient with me, and I will pay it all.' Then the king was filled with pity for him, and he released him and forgave his debt.
"But when the man left the king, he went to a fellow servant who owed him a few thousand dollars. He grabbed him by the throat and demanded instant payment. His fellow servant fell down before him and begged for a little more time. `Be patient and I will pay it,' he pleaded. But his creditor wouldn't wait. He had the man arrested and jailed until the debt could be paid in full.
"When some of the other servants saw this, they were very upset. They went to the king and told him what had happened. Then the king called in the man he had forgiven and said, `You evil servant! I forgave you that tremendous debt because you pleaded with me. Shouldn't you have mercy on your fellow servant, just as I had mercy on you?' Then the angry king sent the man to prison until he had paid every penny.
"That's what my heavenly Father will do to you if you refuse to forgive your brothers and sisters in your heart." (Matthew 18: 21-35)
You probably have heard this story before, but knowledge is not the issue, application is! Perhaps today God is asking you the same question as the King in the story: "Shouldn't you have mercy on your fellow servant, just as I had mercy on you?"
I'm not saying it's easy, or even pleasant. I've been wronged before, and I must admit that it sometimes feels good to hold anger in your heart. But the point is that if you are a believer, you have been forgiven of an insurmountable debt at Christ's expense. You were "too poor to pay", so Jesus erased the debt. Therefore you have a serious and required responsibility to go through the book of your life and cross out the debts of those who "owe" you.
If you are feeling unforgiven, perhaps it is because you are holding a grudge yourself. If you are holding a grudge against someone else this day, then God will put you in a mental prison until you "pay Him back" for the death of Christ...think your mental bank account can handle that one?
P.A.
"Be silent, and know that I am God!" (Pslam 46:10)
Ever find yourself saying to people: "My schedule is crazy right now"? How about: "Man, I am so tired these days from all the stuff I have to do".
I hear that all the time, in fact I've said it myself. What a shame, because that's not the way God intended life to be lived. In reality, it's Satan who tempts us to push our schedule to the brink. If he can't get us sinning, he can at least keep us busy.
It doesn't have to be that way, you know? Somewhere in between the time of your aggravating alarm in the morning and your final feelings before bed, you should take a spiritual breather.
But I don't have time! I have way too much to do already!
Are you sure? Maybe you've just piled up a heaping helping of hectic hullabaloo.
Here's a story that illustrates the point:
As Jesus and the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem, they came to a village where a woman named Martha welcomed them into her home. Her sister, Mary, sat at the Lord's feet, listening to what he taught. But Martha was worrying over the big dinner she was preparing. She came to Jesus and said, "Lord, doesn't it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me."
But the Lord said to her, "My dear Martha, you are so upset over all these details! There is really only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it-and I won't take it away from her." (Luke 10:38-42)
Martha had a smart phone. Martha had a cell-phone. Martha defined herself by her diligent diversions. Martha was so busy 'doing' for God that she forgot where God was- in her own living room!
People in our day would look down on Mary.
"What have you been doing all day Mary?"
"Nothing."
"Oh, are you sick? Is there something wrong? Why aren't you being productive?"
Notice what Jesus said: "There is really only one thing worth being concerned about..."
I suggest that each and every day you schedule a "peace out" time where you do nothing but sit at Jesus' feet. I must warn you, though; it will come at a price. You might fall behind on the flow of "America's Got Talent", or even miss out on the latest half-baked serving of Jersey Shore!
The important thing to keep in mind is that every precious second invested in your relationship with Christ can never be taken away.
What does a "peace out" time look like?
I get alone, in a quiet room or in a park. I focus my thoughts on Jesus, knowing that God is in control. I listen intently to all that is going on, and I turn my eyes upon Jesus in worship, praise, adoration, and love. I remember His blessings, I confess my sins, I plead for grace, and most importantly: I am silent so I can know that He is God.
Peace out!
I recently read about a pastor who moved to Houston, Texas. Some weeks after he arrived, he had occasion to ride the bus from his home to the downtown area. When he sat down, he discovered that the driver had accidentally given him a quarter too much change.
As he considered what to do, he thought to himself, 'you better give the quarter back. It would be wrong to keep it'. Then he thought, 'Oh, forget it, it's only a quarter. Who would worry about this little amount? Besides, the bus company already gets too much fare; they will never miss it. Accept it as a gift from God and keep quiet.'
When his stop came, he paused momentarily at the door, and then he handed the quarter to the driver and said, "Here, you gave me too much change."
The driver with a smile, replied, "Aren't you the new pastor in town? I have been thinking lately about going to worship somewhere. I just wanted to see what you would do if I gave you too much change."
As soon as he stepped off the bus, he literally grabbed the nearest light pole with a tight grip and said, "O God, I almost sold your Son for a quarter."
It's the little things, isn't it? I know we're always on the lookout to make sure that we don't commit the "big" sins- otherwise we might be a poor testimony to those outside the faith. So we go to the right social events, see R rated movies on the other side of town, and keep all of our fingers on the wheel when someone cuts us off in traffic.
So why is Christianity so quickly becoming a non-factor in its influence on culture? Because we've sold the Son for a quarter- that's why! We're so focused on the external appearance of our 'testimony' that we've forgotten the most important thing: people don't care what you know until they know that you care. In order to show people that compassion of Christ, we must first start by letting the Holy Spirit change us from the inside out.
There were people in Jesus' day who loved to show everyone what a great testimony they had. They prayed long prayers in public, never missed church, recited Scripture, wore religious symbols, and generally gave the impression that they had 'super-sized' their spirituality.
Jesus despised them.
The strongest things Jesus ever said were never directed at the "sinful" people- but He sure opened up a can on the pretentious pietistic people of the day. Here is one example of Christ's feelings towards them:
"You're hopeless, you religion scholars and Pharisees! Frauds! You burnish the surface of your cups and bowls so they sparkle in the sun, while the insides are maggoty with your greed and gluttony. Stupid Pharisee! Scour the insides, and then the gleaming surface will mean something. "You're hopeless, you religion scholars and Pharisees! Frauds! You're like manicured grave plots, grass clipped and the flowers bright, but six feet down it's all rotting bones and worm-eaten flesh. People look at you and think you're saints, but beneath the skin you're total frauds." (Matthew 23:25-28)
Don't mince words, Jesus- how do you really feel?
These folks suffered from an extreme case of what I would call "outward-itis"...only what people could see mattered to them.
God has a different plan. He wants us to start by looking at what is wrong in our hearts before we start coming off 'religious' to others. The world definitely does not need more Bible thumping bobble head figures who can simultaneously say "God Bless" to a cashier while at the same time pocketing the extra change they receive. Unbelievers need to believe that we believe- which requires us to be real, admit mistakes, and take care of the little things.
Bottom line: before you fasten the WWJD bracelet on your wrist- make sure it is emblazoned on your heart!
It starts with the basics. Smile. Say 'please' and 'thank you'. Open doors. Let folks with fewer items ahead of you in line. Give back change- and on and on...
This week, watch and pray for opportunities. Most importantly, listen to the instruction from the One who can keep you from selling Him for a quarter:
Do you want to stand out? Then step down. Be a servant. If you puff yourself up, you'll get the wind knocked out of you. But if you're content to simply be yourself, your life will count for plenty. (Matthew 23:11-12)
